Bloggle Vision: Round 1

"Bloggle Vision" is a weekly, speculative column on topics as near as a day in the future up to as far away as a year. Remember to check back on each entry to see how close the predictions ended up being.

a) The season finale of "Who Wants to Be a Superhero?" airs tonight on Sci-Fi. The final two competitors will be The Defuser and Hyper-Strike. Stan Lee will choose The Defuser because he conforms better to Lee's writing style.

b) WWE Monday Night Raw revealed that Mr. Kennedy is not Mr. McMahon's illegitimate son. His son will be revealed next Monday night. It will still end up being Mr. Kennedy despite the attempt at a swerve. This is based on the clue, "things are looking up." Mr. Kennedy's microphone drops down from the ceiling.

c) "Grand Theft Auto IV" is still set to be released around Quarter 2 of next year (it ends on April 30, 2008). The game's more realistic tone will probably rule out the appearance of a jet pack device. In order to allow the player to explore as much of the massive urban environment as possible, Nico will be skilled at parkour.

d) Production for the live action "Street Fighter" movie is to begin in early 2008. Since the plot centers around Chun-Li and is directed by Andrzej Bartkowiak ("Cradle 2 the Grave"), it will pretty much be a rip-off of female revenge films like "Kill Bill" and "The Brave One."

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Grand Theft Auto 4 Delayed to 2008

Noooooooooooo!

*sniff*

So much for my big incentive to buy an XBox 360 this year. I suppose now I can wait until Microsoft starts building units that don't catch fire and explode. Strauss Zelnick, Chairman of Take-Two, said:

"Certain elements of development proved to be more time-intensive than expected, especially given the commitment for a simultaneous release on two very different platforms," said Take-Two chairman Strauss Zelnick in a statement.

This never would have happened if Rockstar didn't have to develop the game for that oversized fail-machine PS3. Between the Wii's backward graphical capabilities, the XBox's hardware issues, and the PS3's severe lack of titles, it would just be nice to hear some good news once in a while.

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GTA Fights War On Terror With Words

WKTT Talk Radio, one of the new radio stations appearing in the latest GTA, is looking for people to phone-in and leave their thoughts about various topics. The WKTT Radio site says:

Call the station right now at 212-360-2368 and tell us what you think is wrong with Liberty City, American, Liberals, or your health. Tell the host you love the show. He likes that.

I hope someone finds a subtle way to make fun of Jack Thompson or any of those other bleeding heart liberals that are trying to link videogame violence with real life violence. That line of thinking gets me so mad that I sometimes black out. I always end up waking in front of some retirement home with what looks like red corn syrup on my hands. Since I don't actually get hurt by these incidents, I think nothing more of them. What was I saying again? Oh yeah, GTA is awesome.

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