Thursday, October 18, 2007

Lead Singer of Linkin Park Not So Emo As He Appears


Whether or not things are crawling in his skin, and whether or not he does indeed bear wounds that will not heal, Chester Bennington of Linkin Park may not be as emo as he appears.

In a show in Australia last weekend, Chester showed off his dexterity skills after the fourth song, and promptly fell off the stage. Due to the fact that he must have put all his skill points in Charisma, the fall resulted in a broken arm. At this point, it would not be difficult to guess what Chester would do, being the lead singer of a band that has helped popularize the current “emo music” trend in what is considered to be modern rock these days. The most obvious act to follow up one the act of arm-breaking, would be to cry about it. Loudly. With angsty guitars and whiny harmonies backing him up.

Chester, however, did not take this course of action. He finished the show with his broken arm, running around on stage and screaming out the rest of the set for more than an hour. Perhaps some of his screams were real pain this time, but the fact that he decided to man up and finish the show is impressive. Perhaps Linkin Park deserves a second chance. Perhaps they will lead rock music away from the emo trend. Perhaps they will stand as shining examples of strength for depressed teenagers everywhere.

Then again, perhaps I will shit out pure gold.

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Monday, October 8, 2007

Die, Rebel Scum


X Wing Rocket - Watch more free videos

Andy Woerner and friends built a replica of a Star Wars X-Wing fighter and shot it out in the California desert. The resulting launch was, well, let's just say it was on par with the quality of the prequel trilogy.

Watching this video makes me wonder exactly how the Rebels won the Galactic Civil War. Oh yeah, it's because Darth Vader used to be a pansy, so his pansy ass son, Luke, got him to switch sides so they could kill the Emperor with tears and poetry. God I hate George Lucas.

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Wednesday, October 3, 2007

Nicolas Cage Wakes Up To Naked Burglar


Let me tell you how my weekends go. As soon as it hits 11pm, I take off my clothes, run outside, and go break into celebrities homes. It’s tough work, but someone has to do it.

That’s why it makes me so sad to hear about this poor man who was caught on Monday morning, running around nearly naked in Nicolas Cage’s house. That man is doing a job that no one else wants to do, and Nicolas Cage has to go and bust him, just because he’s rubbing his wang on various pieces of furniture. It ain’t fair, man. It ain’t fair. Those pieces of furniture were asking for it.

Oh, and by the way - isn't this an awesome mug shot? That's totally the look a dog gives you when it's being scolded for peeing on the carpet. You know that a policeman is probably standing over him with a rolled up newspaper right now.

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